Plenty of things break. You could break one of your belongings. Or one of your bones. But your self-love should not break.
Emotionally speaking, you may also feel broken at times. Someone may hurt your feelings or worse, they might neglect or abuse you. You may grieve a lost love or career or your health and feel shattered. Sometimes a sense of brokenness is the result of sudden, life-altering events far beyond your control…global pandemic, anyone?
Whatever the situation, your self-esteem can take a hit and even the simplest tasks may feel onerous and overwhelming. But take heart! You’re not broken. Transitions take time. You’re just in the midst of a difficult process.
Give yourself a chance to grow. Participate in self-love and acceptance. Discover the possibilities that lie ahead and the purpose in your pain.
How? Focus on embracing this journey rather than escaping it. Your experience isn’t insurmountable In fact, it’s actually instructional.
Emotional Pain Does Not Mean You’re Broken
Emotional pain is a normal part of the human condition. and it can help you feel far more gratitude for those times when your life seems aligned. Thinking of the bad times as being “broken” can make it more difficult to discern a path forward. A more productive perspective might include:
- Accepting that things feel bad and very unclear at the moment
- Embracing self-love as you work toward clarity
In tough times, it’s easy to see your psyche as something you need to get “fixed.” But what you really need from yourself is patience, compassion, and unconditional love. This is a recipe for self-awareness. The more accepting you become, the better you can identify patterns in your life that require your attention.
How to Embrace Self-Love and Acceptance
Basic Self-Care Equals Self-Love
This is the foundation. No matter how you feel, you can commit to self-care as proof of your worthiness. Choose healthy eating habits. Engage in exercise and activity every single day. Keep regular sleep patterns. Practice stress management and relaxation techniques.
Set, Enforce, and Respect Boundaries
Healthy boundaries can help ward off any feeling of brokenness. Establish and articulate your needs and limits. Speak up if those needs and limits are not acknowledged. Be sure to hear and respect others when they set their own boundaries.
Learn to Forgive Others…and Yourself. You Are Worthy of Acceptance.
Forgiveness is essential when we feel discouraged. Surely, there are many factors — and probably a few people — involved. Take time to assess the situation and your role in it. Forgive yourself and/or others if necessary. Ask for an apology, if it is warranted. Apologize if you should. Regardless, make sure conflict resolution occurs by engaging in a sincere apology and willingness to set right of the wrongs between you. What does that look like?
Hold yourself accountable, show remorse, promise to never do it again, and do the work to follow through on that promise.
Choose Mindfulness
When you feel broken, it’s easy to dwell on the past and dread the future. Mindfulness teaches us to honor the present. At this moment, life is happening. At this moment is where you can find the clarity you need to endure your current struggles.
Dialogue With Your Inner Monologue
The enemy of self-love and acceptance is negative self-talk. Challenge this inner monologue. Demand evidence for its claims. Present evidence to debunk those claims.
Asking For Help with Self-Love
On the contrary, reaching out for support is the exact opposite of being broken. You show incredible strength in opening up to others. Healing begins when we connect and share our stories. An ideal setting for this kind of healing exists each week in your therapy sessions. Working in conjunction with a skilled counselor, you can learn to recognize behavioral patterns that can make you feel broken. From there, you can implement new intentions, new ideas, and new approaches. You can let go of the habits that prevent you from reaching your unrealized potential.
